I’m not telling you this as a bid for pity (or as a prod for you to go out and buy my book but if you did, that’d be totally ok), I’m telling you this because it’s real. And that’s what my website is about: to give first hand insight into the struggle to become a known, selling author. A lot of what you read here won’t be pretty but it will be honest.
I published my book, Mermaid: a novel, in August of 2020 and I’ve sold twelve copies.
Twelve.
And all the sales have been to friends and family. Thank goodness for them, huh?
This is going to sound so silly, but I thought once I put it out there, people would find it. That with the millions of people in world, at least a few thousand would run across my book and find it interesting enough to pick up. Even after all the books I’ve read and podcasts I’ve listened to saying otherwise, I thought once I wrote ‘the end’ the hard work was done. Not even close.
The problem is, and I’m sure I’m preaching to the choir here, there are so many books and so many authors out there. When I go looking for a new read, the quantity makes my eyes spin. There are free books, and cheap books, good books and terrible books, self-published, indie published and big five published, new authors and established authors. Whatever you want, it’s out there (and a whole lot you don’t want but that’s a topic for a different day). It’s a great situation for a reader, not so great as a writer. Especially a new writer.
How does my one little book stand out among all the loud, flashy voices vying for readers attention. How is my self-published work supposed to get attention among all the books published by teams of professionals? How do I compete with all the glossy covers and marquee light names? My one little pixel in a sea of light?
To the writing world, I do not exist, and I can blame only myself for this. See, I don’t use most of marketing/socializing tools that proper authors use. I have no platform to leverage myself upon. I do not have a following. I do not have a ‘tribe’. Heck, just the use of that word in this sense makes me cringe.
Seven months, twelve sales and what’s the solution? To go get myself a tribe’? To tweet myself cross-eyed in the hopes of a sale? To send out another round of query letters asking agents and publishers to give me a try? Maybe.
I’ll be honest, I’m not ready for the disappointment of rejection letters again, or worse, the demeaning feeling of getting no response at all. And I’m not yet confident enough to shout over all the voices already clamoring in the ether. Right now it’s enough to know that I wrote a book and I published that book. It’s enough to know it’s sitting out there in the world, waiting patiently to be discovered.
Perhaps one day, defeated and disheartened, I’ll shout ‘look at me!’ from virtual rooftops. But for right now, I’ll put my effort and focus on writing a book the world won’t be able to ignore.
I’ll leave you with a question: What are you doing to get the world to see you? How do you stand out among the crowd? And has it been worth the effort you’ve put in?
If you’re interested in checking out Mermaid: a novel, here’s where to find it: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/mermaid-jessica-cushman/1137535143?ean=2940164489588 or https://www.amazon.com/MERMAID-NOVEL-Jessica-Cushman-ebook/dp/B08GPVLY3P/ref=sr_1_4?dchild=1&keywords=Jessica+Cushman&qid=1619352610&sr=8-4. Let me know what you think.
As always, keep writing and thank you for listening.